Freud: Psychology of Lover

Freud, S. (1910). A special type of choice of object made by men. Standard Edition, 11, pp. 163- 176. (cf. Gay, 1989, pp. 387-394).

Up till now we have left it to the creative writer to depict for us the 'necessary conditions for loving' which govern people's choice of an object, and the way in which they bring the demands of their imagination into harmony with reality. ... Science is, after all, the most complete renunciation of the pleasure principle of which our mental activity is capable (Freud, 1910, p. 165).

Preconditions for loving (pp. 166-167):

(1) Rivalry: that there should be 'an injured party'"the person in question shall never choose as his love-object a woman who is disengaged," but rather "only one to whom another man can claim right of possession as her husband."

(2) Jealousy: that of the woman's being like a prostitute"
... a woman who is chaste and whose reputation is irreproachable never excercises an attraction that might raise her to the status of a love-object," but "only a woman whose fidelity and reliability are open to some doubt."

(3) Compulsive Repetition: "passionate attachments of this sort are repeated with the same peculiarities each an exact replica of the others"

(4) Rescue Phantasies: "The man is convinced that she is in need of him, that without him she would lose all moral control and rapidly sink to a lamentable level."