Hearts Club

Of course, new players are not only welcomed but also helped to understand the game and its many nuances of strategy. We also keep records for the benefit of competitive players and will host tournament at the end of the semester to out Haverford's own premier Ace of Hearts. So, take a short break from your studies one night a week and come down to Lunt to have a few laughs, a good chat, and a nice game of cards. Hearts, like baseball and cricket, has a rich game-specific jargon which has evolved over semesters of play here at Haverford. For the benefit of our newer members, I've posted some of the most common need-to-know hearts terminology.

• The Deuce (n): refers to the 2 of Clubs, which must always begin the first trick. Mentioning the deuce is often a polite way to remind whoever holds it to begin the round.
• The Jack (n): Refers usually but not exclusively to the Jack of Spades, which many feel is the best card in the game for players who like to take control early. A player may feel confident about his ability to flush if he or she's got the jack.
• Club-Dumping (n): the systematic passing of all of one's clubs to another player. Since the first trick must always be clubs, club dumping, especially in the absence of counteraction, can be an effective way to play off suit early in the round
• The Thunderbolt,Thunderbolt (n,v): To play the Queen of Spades off suit on the first hand of the round. This is an especially savage way to begin a round because the player with the highest low-club is often trapped. This usually implies club-dumping and can often percipitate arguments and accusations against other players of not passing a club.
• Q-Bomb (n,v): To play the Queen of spades off suit onto another player. This usually refers to a situation in which few players suspect the Queen to be played.
• The Challenger, Challenge (n,v): A player's failed attempt to "Shoot the Moon". A challenger hand usually refers to one in which a single player takes over 20 points in a failed shot attempt. The victim takes on the role of the tragic hero falling from grace, whilst the other players usually have a good laugh. The term takes its origins from the infamous American space disaster
• The Columbia, Columbia (n,v): When a player feels certain that they have the neccesary cards to shoot the moon independent of other players' actions before the end of the hand, but that certainty is in fact wrong and they fail to capture every heart before the round expires. In other words, the player feels safe but then goes up in flames towards the end. Takes its name from the infamous American space disaster
• Michael Trickless (adv): When a player does not win a single trick during a given round. This is not neccesarily superior to taking several non-point tricks in terms of scoring, but it gives off the aire of de facto superiority. Derives its name from the multiple Academy Award winning actor, Michael Chiklis
• Relegation, Relegated (n,v): The process of either being forced off the table, or forced from the Premiership table to the Championship after prolonged abysmal play. After a given number of hands the worst player is often forced to leave so other players may join the game, or rankings may change.
• The Five Card Plan (n): Passing five cards before the hand begins instead of the usual three. Highly illegal and highly hilarious. Signature play of Hearts legend, Dave Merrell
• 4-f@#k (v): To take the Queen of Spades with a 4 of any suit. This usually means that two players have put down the 2 and 3 of that suit, and the last remaining player has played the Queen off-suit. Often very disheartening.
• The Bitch (n): The Queen of Spades. It is not pleasant to take a trick with the Queen of Spades as one recieves 13 points for doing so.
• M. Night Shyamalan's Lady in the Water (n): The Queen of Spades
• Flushing the Bitch, Flushing (v): The process through which one or more players attempt to out the Queen by continually leading tricks with low Spades. This is an attempt to force the player dealt the Queen of Spades to take it in turn.
• Falling on your Sword (v): When the player who was originally dealt the Queen of Spades is forced to play it on suit, and take the trick themselves
• Taking it to the Grave/Bottom (v): See Falling on your Sword
• Classically Trained (adj): Refers to a player who has learned the game of Hearts through playing it on the MS Windows games bar. Usually very proficient as a player, and especially fond of Flushing.
• I Have to Return some Videotapes: A player will often utter this phrase when he/she no longer wishes to play hearts, but is unwilling to divulge his or her reasons for leaving abruptly. Origins from Brett Easton Ellis's classic novel, American Psycho.

My Links

• Hearts Wiki
  A detailed description of the rules, history, and strategy of Hearts
• Lunt Cafe
  Lunt Cafe, Hearts Club venue